jennifer-roberts Have you seen the very popular television show called, “The Masked Singer?” It is now in its fifth season and boasts a viewing audience of nearly six million viewers. Each week fans tune in to watch celebrities donning elaborate costumes which include ornate masks try to keep their identities hidden from a panel of celebrities who are trying to guess each contestant’s identity. Each masked contestant sings and provides clues about his or her identity but the clues are not obvious. You must know something about music to make educated guesses. Each week a contestant is eliminated, and his/her identity is revealed until there is only one masked singer left.
I watched the show once. It was entertaining but it would have been more interesting if I knew more about music. But I digress. “The Masked Singer” was enjoyable for 60 minutes because its purpose is to entertain but imagine how exhausting it would be to conceal your identity as a way of life. Sadly, this is a reality for many people.
It may sound strange but there are thousands if not millions of people on the stage of life pretending to be someone else or not showing up as their authentic selves hoping that no one will see through their charade and guess their identity. These acts happen in relationships, social interactions and workplaces and often time the people stuck inside the costume feel trapped.
This Huffing Post article, https://www.huffpost.com/entry/are-you-pretending-just-s_b_13728160 by Mary Morrissey speaks well to the dangers of living behind a mask, even temporarily.
Morrissey submits in part that “We may stifle our true feelings and not express ourselves fully in order to gain love, respect or acceptance from friends, family, colleagues or clients – and sometimes even total strangers.”
She goes on to say that “Pretending to be someone other than who you are only broadens the distance between yourself and the person you’re trying to establish closeness with.”
People pretend for a variety of reasons often times stemming from fear or past hurt. Some people want to fit in to a social clique. Others lack self-worth and believe that family members, co-workers or friends will also deem them unworthy. And still others pretend to be someone else or work tirelessly to cover up deficiencies because they fear being exposed and ultimately rejected. Most people don’t take on a totally different persona, but they work to hide or compensate for inadequacies that would be embarrassing if exposed.
Pretending is draining for the person putting on the act but it is also exhausting for the people who love them especially if loved ones or friends see the inconsistencies that the person is working so hard to conceal. Imagine being in a relationship with a parent, spouse or child who doesn’t or can’t show up as themselves. It makes it impossible to get to know or love the person for who he or she really is.
Faking an identity is arduous and prevents us from living the full life that God intends for us to have. There is vulnerability in showing up as ourselves but there is also freedom in our authenticity.
Ask yourself, “Am I showing up as myself or am I presenting a version of myself that I think is acceptable to the public.” Be honest and make the necessary changes that will help you live a more authentic life.
